Thursday, July 06, 2006

Killer Socks

Most humans do not realize the danger of Killer Socks.

Killer Socks is a potentially fatal phenomenon which generally occurs during the hottest part of the summer when ordinary socks are washed and then dried in a dryer while an air conditioner is running somewhere within the household. (Be especially careful: "household" can include an entire apartment house or adjoining condominium complex. In rare circumstances, even a refrigerator running within 300 yards of the socks has been known to trigger disaster.)

A unique combination of ions collects on the fabric. The mere process of sorting and folding a pair of socks can result in a painful wound or can even prove deadly. There is no known test to identify when the combination of ions is reaching critical mass. Research dollars are desperately needed to study this situation which is the unspoken reason why so many humans in Western society wear sandals in the summer.

If you MUST wear socks and INSIST on clean ones, don't despair, there is hope.

An alert feline, as demonstrated here by Charlie, intimately involved in the process of folding socks, can use their "feline senses" to detect the deadly combination of ions and intercept the Killer Socks before they intercept you.
Just one more reason why no "good" household should ever be without a resident feline.

You can trust Charlie on THAT one!

15 comments:

William said...

Phew, that was close! You can't be too careful with killer socks!

Hot(M)BC said...

Go Charlie! Get them killer socks!

~~ Boni

grazikitty said...

Hi! It was great your visit in my blog! Don´t you understand anything in my blog? Oh! What pity!
My virtual space speak about my routine and about cats. I got one her name is Chela, she´s a siamese.
I deffend rights of homeless cats over here, in Rio de Janeiro.
Very cute your cat! Thanks for your visit! Bye.

George, Tipper, Max & Misty said...

Charlie, our Mom wants to know if you'd hire yourself out to roust out all socks everywhere. Somewhere in our house are squillions of socks, alone and hiding, waiting for the right moment to attack.

Feline Oligarchy said...

I'd LOVE to come to Wisconsin! Maybe I also could come and help train Misty in the fine art of detecting Killer Socks when she's older? -- Charlie

Victor Tabbycat said...

I'm the laundry inspector at our house. Killer socks, jammy bottoms, an night shirts are my specialties. Bonnie sticks to underwear.
Hee, hee, hee! Bonnie *sticks* to unnerwear... hee hee ha ha ha ha!
*rolls off puter chair*
Umph.

Anonymous said...

Charlie, LOL!! You look fearsome!!!
~nala

Emma's Kat said...

Emma says she absolutely loves your blog and that you're....cute, Charlie! She also thanks you for visiting her blog. She's a little shy, so she has me post comments for her! :) Benji, btw, is our resident "killer sock" hunter!

Beau Beau & Angie said...

Hee heeeee! Good job wif taking care of those sockies Charlie.

Ayla said...

Hmmm. So I had good reason to throw up on the Mom's socks last night? Thanks. :)

Scooby, Shaggy & Scout said...

Keep 'em in line Charlie! Mighty hunter & protector of the house!

Patches & Mittens said...

I am so glad you brought this problem to light. It is long overdue. There is another problem you didn't mention...the stinky summer sock!! Maybe you could do a series on socks. Also, what about the missing sock your washer or dryer eat?

Pataches Lady

Anonymous said...

That a boy Charlie.Attack cat on guard those socks don't stand a chance.

Rico Loco said...

It's even more fun when the killer socks are on feet..hehe.

one of us said...

Wow, thank goodness our 'beans were sandals all year round. Mom only puts on socks in the direst need. ~Merlin, shadow, Ko Ko