Tuesday, May 09, 2006

How to stalk a Roomba (Charlie's version)

What IS that noise? What IS that blue thing that scoots all over the floor? Back and forth. I see it has whiskers sweeping along it's underside. Is this a food source?

Today, I will be silent.

Today, I will study and observe it's movements.

Today, I will carefully plan my future hunt.

Today, I will poise my body gaging how I will implement my attack.

Tommorrow, I will annihilate, assassinate,

blot out, butcher, decimate, massacre, slaughter, wipe out; cut down, finish, nip, snuff, execute, murder and smite that blue intruder.

Roomba, your days are numbered.

Charlene Frances Jeanne, the dauntless heroine, is on duty.

2 comments:

Cruxley said...

My female human was thinking about getting one of those things but instead she ripped all the carpets out and put down a floor. I was glad to see the vacuum cleaner go. But just the other day she was reading about a floor cleaner that moves around like the roomba. It's called a scooba and thankfully costs $400 so I don't think I'll be seeing one any time soon. But I don't like that look in her eye. I may have to practice your techniques just in case.

Cruxley said...

My female human was thinking about getting one of those things but instead she ripped all the carpets out and put down a floor. I was glad to see the vacuum cleaner go. But just the other day she was reading about a floor cleaner that moves around like the roomba. It's called a scooba and thankfully costs $400 so I don't think I'll be seeing one any time soon. But I don't like that look in her eye. I may have to practice your techniques just in case.